Back Together With Ex Girlfriend? How to Start With a Clean Slate
Are you finally back together with your ex girlfriend? Congratulations! By now you know that getting an ex back can be a very tough undertaking. But guess what? Now comes the hard part: making the relationship work this time around.
In winning back your ex, you’ve already made progress getting her to miss and need you again. Keeping your girlfriend after you’ve won her back is all going to depend upon what you do next. The one thing you’ve got going against you is a past history of breaking up. To move forward you need to put this past behind you as quickly and firmly as possible, so the two of you can concentrate on creating a future together.
Letting Go of Past Mistakes
No matter why the two of you broke up, each of you needs to let go of the past mistakes – and not just your own, but the mistakes of your exgirlfriend. Chances are good she did things that hurt you, just as you might’ve done to hurt her. But the good news is that if you’ve decided to get back together again? You’re already committed to giving each other a second chance. Even if something as bad as cheating is involved, you can move past the pain and betrayal by accepting the fact that you’ve chosen to create a new relationship with your ex girlfriend, instead of trying to fix the old one.
Sitting Down to Heal Old Wounds
When the two of you went your separate ways, it was for a reason. You both had issues with each other that might’ve driven you apart – don’t feel bad, this happens to every relationship or marriage. Instead of nitpicking each other on these many issues, choose the select few that are the biggest. Sit down calmly and maturely to air your grievances with each other, and to hash out the past problems that might’ve caused the end of your relationship. Getting back together with ex girlfriend etiquette requires that you LISTEN when your ex speaks. Take her feelings into account, and try to take any constructive criticism of your behavior with a grain of salt. Be open to allowing her to tell you what she felt was wrong with the romance… and she’ll be open to the same thing when it’s your turn to speak. But putting these things out on the table and discussing them in a non-confrontational manner, without placing blame? You’re taking giant steps toward getting back together with your ex and starting with a very clean slate.
Let Bygones Be Bygones
Once you’ve gotten everything out in the open, push it all to the side. Visually imagine those issues the two of you had sitting before you on the table, and then swipe them all onto the floor with a sweep of your arm. These are problems the two of you are leaving in the past. By agreeing to get back together, you’re going to agree that they shouldn’t be addressed anymore. No longer will it be acceptable to bring them up during arguments, fights, or general disagreements – you can’t keep pointing at the past if you want a happy, constructive future together. Even if you did things that may have been very hurtful, and she did the same things to you, allowing yourselves room for forgiveness is important to the overall makeup process.
Build a New Foundation
When a house burns down you can’t just start building a new one. First, you need to sweep the smoldering ruins of the old one aside. When you start with a clean, fresh foundation, anything you build upon it will be a lot stronger. This is your new relationship – not to be confused with the old one. Getting back together with an ex girlfriend means you’ve decided to give your relationship a second chance – so don’t shoot yourselves in the foot by rehashing things that have already happened. Think new, not old. Take your girlfriend to places you’ve never been, instead of the same old haunts of your old relationship. By keeping things new and changing them up? You’ll make all new memories to cherish – memories that won’t be tainted by the mistakes of the past.
Now if you happen to be stuck on the road to getting your girlfriend back, don’t panic. There are many methods and techniques you can use to regain her interest, even if your girlfriend was the one who dumped you. In any break up circumstance there are ways to rekindle the feelings and emotions your ex still has for you. Learning the right and wrong ways to do this is a critical part of the reconciliation process.